Sunday, February 21, 2010

Half Empty or Half Full?

Life is about perspective.

I think of the analogy of seeing the glass half empty or half full. It's the same glass, yet two people see it totally different. Optimists and Pessimists. I think that we all have an inclination to be positive or negative. I'm guessing that part of it is in your nature and part is learned. But either way, we have a tendency to see things in a positive light or a negative light.

And people think they can't change.

Let's talk about pessimists first. It's extremely draining to be around someone who always sees the negative side in every situation. Someone who jumps to worrying or the "but what-if such-and-such bad thing happens??" The person who always has a story to show how they are worse off or someone who discredits your bad day by telling you how they should get more sympathy than you. Annoying.

The fact is, it's extremely draining to be around perpetual pessimists. For me, if I don't find a way to phase that person out, I will most likely call them out at some point b/c I just can't handle it. Don't get me wrong, though... there is definitely times for complaining, legitimate reasons to worry, or one-up someone with your "I have it worse" story. But the truth of the matter is that no one likes being around someone who is constantly a buzz kill.

Now let's talk about optimists... they aren't always cheery to be around either. Just like someone who is constantly negative, it's also annoying to be around someone who is just too positive. I am sorry, but sometimes, you have to be like, yeah, your day/situation sucks and there is nothing good about that! If someone is always positive, it can come across as fake and not genuine at all.

I guess what I'm saying is we need balance. I like to think of myself as someone who doesn't see the glass half empty or half full (maybe the cup was just not the right size to being with?). I feel like I am a realist. I like to look at the situation and think of realistic outlooks. I will admit when something is super crappy but also try and see the positive in something, if there is a positive to been seen.

So, if you find that you are too optimistic or too pessimistic, there is hope for you. You can change! Like any other habit, it takes deliberate attempts to create the changes you want. If you constantly see the negative in things, try and think of one positive after you've caught yourself thinking negatively. And remember that just because you might have a "bigger better" story or you might have it worse off, realize that for the other person, they are having a moment where they need you to understand, not try and top it. If you are overly positive, try and see why someone is frustrated or not on cloud 9 with you. We can all use a little sympathy at times.

I am not sure why I blogged about this. I was actually intending on blogging about attitudes and how I find it annoying that people are rude to those closest to them when someone else makes them mad. I mean, be nice to your friends, even if you are feeling crabby. We can at least try and empathize and be someone to vent too! Or if you don't feel like talking, tell your friends you are having a bad day so we know not to take it personal! Ok, I will save that for another day :)

1 comment:

A day in the Life... said...

I agree both can be equally annoying. Interestingly we are focusing on joy at church and have touched on some of these things. No being optimistic persay but rejoicing and being joyful in all things, even when we don't want to.